A letter from Rineburgundy to the Babelonians.
Twice a month the six founding Babelers host a Babeled On virtual sit-down where a lone Babeler must enter the Fortress of Solitude to decide upon a topic worthy of Babeledom.
The question of afterlife has plagued mankind for thousands of years. Religions have been born out of assumptions about what happens after you die. Therefore, without further ado I present to you this month’s topic: If you could choose what you would want to be reincarnated as, what would you choose and why?
Andrew Blanco
I love being a human. I think most of human suffering comes from how we organize society, and not so much from having a human body, human emotions, and human intelligence. I don’t think we’re a perfect species, but I do think being human comes with many perks. However, a major downside of being human is that our imagination is freer than our physiology allows us to be.
The one thing I’d love to do that I can’t is fly. When I’m sleeping I often have dreams where I am flying, and it feels awesome. If I wanted to reincarnate on this planet and have the ability to fly, I’d be limited to becoming a bird. While this would be cool – especially if I was a Peregrine Falcon (200 mph air speed!) – unfortunately, birds don’t play guitar and so I’d be sacrificing one awesome ability for another awesome ability. That doesn’t sound like a fair deal.
So, if I had absolute complete control over what my consciousness reincarnated as after death, then I would throw my consciousness far far into the future (or a long time ago into the past) of interstellar evolution and be born into a world of advanced Jedi’s. As a Jedi I would be able to fulfill all the supernatural desires that lie dormant in the human imagination – flying included.
With my immense mastery of the Force I would focus my energy to create a Force Guitar. This Force Guitar would basically be a transparent medium between mind and matter. I’d be able to manipulate sound via telepathy: no longer would I have to buy guitar pedals; from now I could just imagine a new tone and it would be. No longer would I have to deal with a guitar going out of tune; that would only happen if I imagined the guitar being out of tune, and why would I ever do that? And no longer would I have to worry about playing too loud and disturbing people; from now on I could just fly into the atmosphere and play my Force Guitar, free from distraction.
As I mastered the immense potential of this Force Guitar I’d eventually be able to direct the Force tones to alter weather patterns, and even to hypnotize people into buying me pizza.
There would potentially be no limitation for those who chose to reincarnate as a Jedi master.
Jeff Ruemeli
If I could choose any animal to come back as it would have to be an Owl. I mean, come on, hoo wouldn’t want the awesome ability of flight and hoo could resist the dominating power of death from above? Sleepin’ all day… Killin’ all night… Never being seen. Not to mention Owl’s have a killer get-up, ferocious talons and a head dress to die for… Moowahahaha…. I hope no one wanted to come back as a field mouse.
Gregory Molyneux
Easy: Sperm Whale
(Kingdom: Animalia, Phylum: Chordata, Class: Mammalia, Order: Cetacea, Suborder: Odontoceti, Family: Physeteridae, Genus: Physeter, Species: P. macrocephalus or P. catodon)
- Superior intelligence
- Uninhibited dominion over 2/3 of the Earth’s surface
- Dive capacity of 10,500 feet (3,200 m) with a duration that approaches two hours
- Echolocation to map the ocean floor and dominate prey
- Seek and destroy the mighty Giant Squid (genus: Architeuthis)
- Massive genitals
Next question.
Jason Morgan
I would want to be reincarnated as a Hindu cow. This way I could eat all day while being worshiped without any of the responsibility that typically goes along with holding a position worthy of worship.
Jack Gamble
If I could be reincarnated as the being of my choosing, I would choose to be a telemarketer. This way I could immediately kill myself and spare the world the aggravation of one more telemarketer and then return to the Earth again as something useful; like a greeter at Wal-Mart.
Coming In Two Weeks . . .
Tag, you’re it, Freedom.
12 Comments
I didn’t know Jedi masters had the ability to fly…
But whales sure can swim.
I believe your assessment of their baby-making organs is accurate, as well.
Yoda definitely knew how to fly!…if he could levitate a spaceship out of a swamp, then I’m sure he could levitate his body off of the ground.
Some may call it semantics, but I do believe levitating and flying are inherently different.
And I believe that difference is the critical aspect that nullifies the ability of an individual to use the force for personal flight.
The only difference would be speed and height. Other than that it’d be the same basic idea.
Velocity, not speed. But other than that, the difference I was referring to was that someone moving another object with the Force is not the same as trying to move one’s self with the Force. And I think that is not the way it works. Geek rant over and out. But this certainly has been a very entertaining little ball-breaking session!
Ok, but if Obi Wan could detach himself from his body (and continue communicating with Luke long after his death), then that means he could manipulate his body like an *object the entire time…Much like Yoda manipulated the ship to make it levitate. They were advanced Jedi’s – that’s why I would want to reincarnate as one of them. They have sick skills. Extreme!
Muahaha! Roger, geek rant out.
Greg is right to an extent. Most people would associate the act of flight with aerodynamic lift generated by a wing (or wing shaped rotor in the case of a helicopter). Levitation does not involve aerodynamics, but rather a self-imposed telekinesis (similar to a Jedi Master lifting an X-wing out of a slimy mud hole). Considering this, it is certainly reasonable to assume that a Jedi could easily levitate his or herself with ease even though it was never actually done in the movies (The book Rebel Stand from the New Jedi Order series actually did feature a Dark Jedi who could levitate himself). So yes Greg, a Jedi can levitate, not fly. That is a human Jedi cannot fly. I am yet to read about a force sensitive winged being, in which case flight and levitation would be possible and not all that difficult to imagine.
Just randomly found your blog somehow. Hilarious.
Thanks for the kind words Cameron.